I enjoyed the article. Thank you for the insights into Xilo’s journey from considering licensure to going the coach route. Im a trans masculine person who is a licensed therapist and I also coach on the side.
I think there’s going to be a big shift towards the coaching model. As an LCSW, I try to support queer, trans and nonbinary people headed towards licensure by offering low cost supervision and low or no cost consultation hours. I also managed to get licensed through the generosity of awesome people who offered the same to me.
I enjoyed the article, but one minor note. Ben Carson did not die of COVID in 2020; he was still the secretary of HUD in 2021. While he did attempt to treat COVID with oleander, it didn't work and he later received regeneron treatment. He is still alive today.
I think you may be thinking of Herman Cain, who did die of COVID in 2020 after a rally in Arizona.
Wow, reading you from Spain. I'm a trans queer man and a psychologist (working as such) and I've always wondered about why are there so many coaches in the US, while in Europe is less common and often seen as scammers. But after reading you... wtf. No wonder why Xilo decided that path (and kudos for doing it); the therapist 'path' is almost impossible there... and now the hourly rates of colleagues there make more sense. In Spain you won't see therapist charging more than 100€ unless they are super specialized and famous, the average hour rate is 60€/65€.
I agree wholeheartedly with the community based care angle so much, and over there it really seems so necessary 🫂
This is such an important article. As a social worker, who had jumped through many of these hoops, I can't tell you how many times I've argued in a non-profit board room of fellow white women about "why don't we get more minority applicants to our positions?" Hmmm ... maybe because only people with generational wealth or a spouse with a well-paying job can afford to be a licensed social worker. (Also, I am among the social workers who hit irreversible burn out in direct clinical practice, so thank you for naming that too.)
One of my favorite trans social workers to follow on social media is Kit Morgan. If you haven't connected yet, I highly recommend you do!
Keep up the thoughtful exploration of ideas around transgender identities in the United States right now. I love reading what you have to say.
Thank you for this article. A trans loved one is 2/3 of the way through a program to become a licensed LMFT; there are no therapists with lived experience in our area (a red part of CA). Once they have their license, I worry about how they will let folks know about their practice w/out putting themselves in harms way, other than word-of-mouth. And yeah, eff Dobson, and good riddance.
thank you for posting this! I am a trans therapist (licensed in WI and CO, with a separate coaching business which allows me to work across state lines) who has been working with trans clients for nearly 20 years. It's been wild for me to see how much this varies by state. When I was living in WI, at the time, I was the only out-trans therapist that I knew of. Here in CO, I am in a professional group of over 50 trans therapists licensed here. I love what you're doing here and would love for you to check out my work: https://queerresilience.substack.com/
Thank you for shining a light on this. The political right and Christian nationalists vilifying the transgender community, is so traumatic for our family. If there is a hell, Dobson is there. He had every opportunity to be a real Christ follower, and chose to hurt people instead of healing them.
These so called “Christians” need to actually spend time reading the Bible, with a humble heart. If they had, they’d be helping us, standing with us, and protecting us.
That alone would ease one sector of the stress we feel. There are so many pieces of the trauma pie, that most have no idea about. We have every stress that other marginalized groups have, plus family rejection, and the trauma of our bodies not matching our spirits. We have medical transitions, that take years of hormones and surgeries. We have the extreme stress of having to “Come out” and face possible rejection from family and
friends. We are bullied and rejected by so called “Christians”, our government, and often our family and peers.
If anyone needs a qualified therapist, we do.
And for “Christians” and Politicians to make it harder for us in just shameful. We are a small, virtually harmless minority.
If there’s a hell, the people who further marginalize us, will definitely be there.
I would LOVE to be "one of the helpers" in my career, which is currently in boring finance. I deeply loved my sex work career and found it incredibly rewarding, where I often found myself in a position to really listen to people and to treat them kindly. Later, I found that having a therapist who was a sex worker previously was critical to my mental health and progress. Wherever Xilo can find that meaningful work - do it Xilo!! It all counts and it MATTERS so much to have representation.
I enjoyed the article. Thank you for the insights into Xilo’s journey from considering licensure to going the coach route. Im a trans masculine person who is a licensed therapist and I also coach on the side.
I think there’s going to be a big shift towards the coaching model. As an LCSW, I try to support queer, trans and nonbinary people headed towards licensure by offering low cost supervision and low or no cost consultation hours. I also managed to get licensed through the generosity of awesome people who offered the same to me.
I enjoyed the article, but one minor note. Ben Carson did not die of COVID in 2020; he was still the secretary of HUD in 2021. While he did attempt to treat COVID with oleander, it didn't work and he later received regeneron treatment. He is still alive today.
I think you may be thinking of Herman Cain, who did die of COVID in 2020 after a rally in Arizona.
Thank you so much for the correction! I’ll update this asap
Wow, reading you from Spain. I'm a trans queer man and a psychologist (working as such) and I've always wondered about why are there so many coaches in the US, while in Europe is less common and often seen as scammers. But after reading you... wtf. No wonder why Xilo decided that path (and kudos for doing it); the therapist 'path' is almost impossible there... and now the hourly rates of colleagues there make more sense. In Spain you won't see therapist charging more than 100€ unless they are super specialized and famous, the average hour rate is 60€/65€.
I agree wholeheartedly with the community based care angle so much, and over there it really seems so necessary 🫂
This is such an important article. As a social worker, who had jumped through many of these hoops, I can't tell you how many times I've argued in a non-profit board room of fellow white women about "why don't we get more minority applicants to our positions?" Hmmm ... maybe because only people with generational wealth or a spouse with a well-paying job can afford to be a licensed social worker. (Also, I am among the social workers who hit irreversible burn out in direct clinical practice, so thank you for naming that too.)
One of my favorite trans social workers to follow on social media is Kit Morgan. If you haven't connected yet, I highly recommend you do!
Keep up the thoughtful exploration of ideas around transgender identities in the United States right now. I love reading what you have to say.
Thank you for this article. A trans loved one is 2/3 of the way through a program to become a licensed LMFT; there are no therapists with lived experience in our area (a red part of CA). Once they have their license, I worry about how they will let folks know about their practice w/out putting themselves in harms way, other than word-of-mouth. And yeah, eff Dobson, and good riddance.
thank you for posting this! I am a trans therapist (licensed in WI and CO, with a separate coaching business which allows me to work across state lines) who has been working with trans clients for nearly 20 years. It's been wild for me to see how much this varies by state. When I was living in WI, at the time, I was the only out-trans therapist that I knew of. Here in CO, I am in a professional group of over 50 trans therapists licensed here. I love what you're doing here and would love for you to check out my work: https://queerresilience.substack.com/
Thank you for shining a light on this. The political right and Christian nationalists vilifying the transgender community, is so traumatic for our family. If there is a hell, Dobson is there. He had every opportunity to be a real Christ follower, and chose to hurt people instead of healing them.
These so called “Christians” need to actually spend time reading the Bible, with a humble heart. If they had, they’d be helping us, standing with us, and protecting us.
That alone would ease one sector of the stress we feel. There are so many pieces of the trauma pie, that most have no idea about. We have every stress that other marginalized groups have, plus family rejection, and the trauma of our bodies not matching our spirits. We have medical transitions, that take years of hormones and surgeries. We have the extreme stress of having to “Come out” and face possible rejection from family and
friends. We are bullied and rejected by so called “Christians”, our government, and often our family and peers.
If anyone needs a qualified therapist, we do.
And for “Christians” and Politicians to make it harder for us in just shameful. We are a small, virtually harmless minority.
If there’s a hell, the people who further marginalize us, will definitely be there.
I would LOVE to be "one of the helpers" in my career, which is currently in boring finance. I deeply loved my sex work career and found it incredibly rewarding, where I often found myself in a position to really listen to people and to treat them kindly. Later, I found that having a therapist who was a sex worker previously was critical to my mental health and progress. Wherever Xilo can find that meaningful work - do it Xilo!! It all counts and it MATTERS so much to have representation.
Isn’t Xilo a “coach” to parents, among other people? Yet Xilo isn’t a parent so Xilo can’t “empathize” or give advice on being a parent.